FR 24 My darker side!

It was a saturday I had planned for pretty much the whole week. Considering Live forever is quite the kino master, We decided he was going to work on my kino all day saturday. As you all know, lately I've had some serious state issues due to my excessive sexual fear. I was getting my self pumped up. Live forever was bussy and kinda unatentive due to his massive success lately(can't blaim the guy, gotta take the chances when they're there) so we got to lucky bar kinda late. Before I knew it, I had another state break down and started seriously choding out and fucking up. My aim for the night was to do 5 to 7 claws(this is when you out your arm around the girls neck and get really close to her)the most I could do was 1 claw and a half assed hugh. I must have done like 5 approaches total. After that we bounced to another venue since Live forever had to meet up a day 2 who turned out to be worth it. He got a BJ and introduced us to her friends. I kinda clicked with one of them but I was so out of state and fucked up in the head I let the interaction die.

MONDAY- I head out with superman. Gotta go to work and its kinda late. We spot an HB in a bookstore. Superman opens her and we start chatting her up. Superman has very good conversation skills. We insta date her and get her #. then I head to work.

My darker side- Lately I've had the most horrible breakdowns, and when I'm in these negative states, it fucks up my game so bad that I can't even approach, and if I do its in a terrible manner and it gets me imediate shutdowns. These state breakdowns are due to my Sexual fear which involves, kino, sexual subjects, or even getting close to some one which is why I can't even do day 2s. Everytime I must act and fail to act, it makes me remember my life long failure to get women, and it makes me lose hope. My issues have been laid out on the table, and its a hard challenge, but I'm taking measures and I wont give up till I defeat this.